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#1
11-02-2005, 09:19 PM
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Need a chuckle.
These still send me laughing, so perhaps you need a good chuckle today!
============== Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with your CD, but it just doesn't work.What am I doing wrong? Tech Support:OK, you've got the CD in the CD drive, right? Customer: Yeah.... Tech Support: And what sort of computer are you using? Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer. It's in the CD player and all I get is weird noises. Listen..... Tech Support: Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!! =============== Stat Counter Tech Support: What kind of computer do you have? Female Customer: A white one... =============== Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out. Tech Support: Have you tried pushing the button? Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck. Tech Support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note. Customer: No . wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry.... =============== Tech Support: Click on the 'My Computer' icon on the left of the screen. Customer: Your left or my left? =============== Tech Support: Good day. How may I help you? Male Customer: Hello... I can't print. Tech support: Would you click on "start"for me and... Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates, damn it! =============== Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it... =============== Customer: I have problems printing in red... Tech Support: Do you have a color printer? Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.. =============== Stat Counter Tech Support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am? Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket. =============== Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore. Tech Support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer? Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer. Tech Support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. Customer: OK Tech Support: Did the keyboard come with you? Customer: Yes Tech Support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard? Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work =============== Stat Counter Tech Support: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7. Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters? =============== Customer: I can't get on the Internet. Tech Support: Are you sure you used the right password? Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it. Tech Support: Can you tell me what the password was? Customer: Five stars. =============== Tech Support: What anti-virus program do you use? Customer: Netscape. Tech Support: That's not an anti-virus program. Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer. =============== Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears. =============== Tech Support: How may I help you? Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail. Tech Support: OK, and what seems to be the problem? Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it? =============== A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. Tech Support: Are you running it under 'Windows'? Customer: No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine. =============== And last but not least: .... Microsoft Tech Support: Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the 'Program Manager'. Customer: I don't have a P. Microsoft Tech Support: On your keyboard, Bob. Customer: What do you mean? Microsoft Tech Support: 'P'.....on your keyboard, Bob. Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!! ============================= Hope you laughed a little today. 
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#2
11-02-2005, 09:28 PM
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Classic.... lmao
I used to have this guy phone me for tech support clent: Andy - I'm having problems me: ok, explain please client explains Me: ok goto start/settings/ blah blah cliebt: I have device manager open me: huh? what? how? did you do what I told you? client: no - I have this open that open now me: huh? what? and on it continues for like half an hr or so -- everytime... I ended up baring his number in the end - he meets me in town - andy- been having problems getting in touch with you Me: you have? can't understand why my phone works when others call.... client: must be my phone then - will you take a look for me... me: *sighs and smiles sweetly* lol |
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#3
11-02-2005, 09:45 PM
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Your subliminal messages aren't clear enough, Andy
__________________
Christina >>Forum Moderator<< Please do not PM me for support. The forum is here for that. |
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#4
11-03-2005, 01:10 AM
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I love this
Quote:
Reminds me of myself . . . Thanks for the laugh . . . China Tea P.S. More, more, more . . . |
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#6
11-05-2005, 06:13 PM
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I knew most of them, but it was fun reading
I got a joke, but this is a real thing. It happened when I was at a local compuer repairing service. The speaker of the phone was on lowd, so that I could easily hear the boss there speaking. The company was ALT-X. It went like this: Customer: Hello, is this ALT-X? Boss:Yes, how can I help you? C: I am looking for a good and cheap computer service. B: I am sorry. You can imagine my reaction - I had tea all over my t-shirt after that.
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#7
11-05-2005, 07:08 PM
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Karsun,
Quote:
Quote:
Thanks for the laugh . . . Need it between breaks from editing my site . . . China Tea |
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